Hold the Turkey, Pass the Stuffing

Emily M. Keeler is a writer and the editor of...

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As the temperature dips, I find myself thinking mostly about bodies and heat. Something about snow makes me crave spice, and I’m not the only one, not by a long shot. Even here at Hazlitt there’s a renewed interest in getting under the covers—you’ve already listened to the latest (sexiest?) episode of The Arcade podcast, right? Also: read Will Sloan’s piece on gonzo porn. Over at The Hairpin, Hazlitt senior editor Alexandra Molotkow got the dirt on big dicks from a guy who has one. Michelle Dean compiled a list of smart books that’ll warm you up good, and somewhere in Florida, an inebriated woman applied for a job in a sex shop and shoplifted a vibrator on her way out the door. She shoved it in her pants, of course. The cunt wants what it wants.

There could never be enough about sex, but I don’t think I have anything more to share with you that could safely be considered SFW. So let’s talk turkey. It’s Thanksgiving down south, and while I’m grateful we Canadians don’t get as nuts over the holiday as our enthusiastic neighbours do, I can’t help but stuff a little holiday love for them in here. So here’s a single, muscular story for American Turkey Day.

Here’s a delightful interview with Greta Gerwig on Frances Ha, writing and playing the character. And hey, since I’m sending you to the Criterion site already, might as well also just click on through to this great Gary Indiana essay on Videodrome.

“…[M]usic, because it can be background and foreground, because it is about sculpting time, often insinuates itself into our lives more in the way that people and events do than in the manner of a movie or a painting. It’s a medium of echoes, inherently conversational.”

Okay, one more sexy thing. Some advice from Pauline, a wonderfully wicked 98-year-old woman: “First of all, a man mustn’t be selfish. He’s had his orgasm, he’s got to make sure she’s had hers, too… If you haven’t got that feeling, and he hasn’t got that feeling, get a divorce. It’s the only way. You’re better off alone. Because when you live with someone that doesn’t make you happy, it’s miserable. It’s worse than being alone.”

Speak, Internet! runs Mondays and Thursdays.

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